Duck Duck Cougar?
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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