look no pants
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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