honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Randomize