whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Randomize
