I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Randomize