Capitaan dildo arrescate!
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Randomize
