where does the pee come out of this thing
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
