and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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