I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
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