So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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