Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
