i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
it's not cheating when I paid for it
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
