There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
