I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Randomize
