I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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