Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize