is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
Randomize
