Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
You're like the curious george of whores
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
