he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
