I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
