I wish I only lived at night.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize
