hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
