Your face is a jimmy john
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize