I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize
