i just google imaged poop.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Randomize
