Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
