i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
