Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize