She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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