glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
