I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
