If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize