At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
