I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I think I just shit out all my problems.
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