ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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