from now on my penis is your penis
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Randomize
