Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Randomize
