I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize