I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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