I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Randomize
