Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
