TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
