Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Man, I meant to go dancing, but accidentally took mushrooms and just threw the frisbee in the park
Surprise ending
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
