I accidentally had phone sex last night
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
it hurts more in the daytime
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
Randomize
