it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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