Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I'm going to go ahead and refrain from sexting you in an airport that is currently at a "level orange" security threat.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
