Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
