? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize