I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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