Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
