she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Randomize
